I will try to convey something to you now, in a rather paradoxical manner: I will try to tell you, with words, to not use words. In school, and basically from birth, they teach you to express yourself through words, and formulate every thought into a word. Words are horrible little prisons for your mind, sometimes intentionally so. What is by definition "rape" and what is "sex" is redefined on a yearly basis to reprogram your brain, but even with normal words the definitions are clear, ranked in order of syllables, and while there are tastes ranging from "fragrance" to "stench", that's just an illusion of freedom. I encourage you to think in a different system: Music.
I'm not talking literal notes, but there are ways in which music plays, that has a language of its own that words cannot compete with. You have tempo, scales, rhythm, leads, bass, et cetera. It is yet another system to tie your mind to, but it is my belief that if you alternate between the two, that you'll be able to learn to think outside of both systems, or at least be able to express yourself twice as well, at least to yourself. Words and reason, can drive our actions, but so can music. Music speaks much more clearly to us, and it's less open to manipulation than reason is, since, while there certainly are musical manipulators, there are a bit less of them. I've been untraining myself of using words, and music has been a great help. I can see through all the "reason artists" who try to tangle people with words, because I have a much clearer perspective of how their fixation of reasoning are in the staff and harmony of things.
Ultimately actions are themselves the optimal language, but you can punctuate your actions as a rhythm. It doesn't have to be a stale rhythm - don't adhere to 4/4 or 3/8, but be decisive in your actions. Few people are in control of their moods, but notice how well your emotional state responds to scales? If you can think freely in terms of scales, then suddenly you can freely control your own emotions instead of letting them control you. You also have instruments to consider: When you decide on a purpose, then it becomes the backing of your symphony, like a bass. Then, on top of that, you perform the melody, which is HOW you do things, and is only a variation on the backing harmonies. ...and speaking of melodies, remember that a rest is also part of a melody. Sometimes you don't have to do anything, and just let the music progress. The important parts are the backing chord changes - that you get those right.