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Angel here. Short story: I'm about to ascend, but in preparation for my "test", I have to spend a week as a mortal. ...and let me tell you: Being mortal fucking sucks! How the fuck do you even manage? My legs have this dull aching in them that just persist. It really hurts! ...and I have five more days of this? Fuck this! ...and sleep! I don't even know where to begin! How do you guys manage this pitiful existence? I can't wait until this week is over, and forget it ever happened. TL;DR: How do I stop my legs from hurting? ...and you suck. Goddamnit you fucking suck! Will try to sleep now. FUCK!

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So when I woke up, the leg pain was gone for a while. Instead my colon ached because I was constipated. ...but now when that's sorted, the leg pain is back. It's like it never stops.

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>shitposting intensifies.. KYS sage

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>>231966 Leg pain is important. Way more important than your phobia for jews. Jews are the genuine christians. You so called "christians" are just fakes, worshipping some kind of romanized judaism. The old testament is where it's at. ...not that I'm a judeo-christian angel, mind you. I'm just saying that if I'd be, I'd be a jewish angel, because they rock. ...and jews rock too. Jews are awesome, and you guys suck. ...even more than humans suck, and that's pretty bad.

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>>231961 >angel here

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>>231968 Cool it with the antisemitism goyim.

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I'm back from being tested, and can finally leave this wretched existence. Hopefully, after the evaluation, I'm allowed to ascend a step even higher. (Pic is from the old web comic Angel Moxie.)

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Ohh Goood, it's so good... The divinity slowly flowing into me, filling my body up again, feels like I can breathe again. It's my life. Fuck you and your stupid existence. You all suck. Tomorrow I can forget all about you, and leg pain, and I can't wait.

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I was born a mortal before I became an angel, and so I have a mother, and what mother would she be if she wasn't a source of grief? My mother is a comparatively well-meaning person. My grief instead lies in her mortality. It lies in the nature of all things mortal, to die. I have offered my mother immortality every time I see her, but she stubbornly refuses it. She says it scares her, like eternal life would be death itself. "We all gotta die some day.", she tells me. My father was the same way: He chose to put his faith in doctors over me, and now he's dead. I don't understand: Why do humans fear living forever? Why do you embrace death instead of perfection? Is there some way that I help you to stop sucking so much? I look at you and I just see rotting, decaying fools. Why don't you want to ascend?

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Being divine feels as wonderful as ever. You just feel... ...well. Satisfied. You can feel the divinity coarsing through your body, making you feel less substantial, like a jellyfish maybe. I can't imagine how my ascension will feel like. Theoretically it should feel even better. There is still a big chance that it'll fail the evaluation, though. Maybe it's not for me to ever know that kind of existence. In a week I'll know my fate.




Update 5